I've been searching for somewhere where I could talk to people like me, better yet, people who prefer things natural, having to deal with having a high risk pregnancy.
I found out I was 10 weeks pregnant March 6th. (I already have a 7 year old) So it was a surprise. With my Son, I had a natural birth with a midwife, and everything went fairly well.
This time, I'm forced to see an OB (specialist). I was so upset hearing that news. I tried arguing maybe I don't really have high BP, every time I've had it taken (which since I gave birth in 2004 was twice in the last 6 months due to sickness) it was high, probably because I just hate hospitals, and I was freaking out when I did come in. I NEVER go to the hospital unless something is seriously wrong. But, it didn't matter. Now I'm sitting there upset, and filling with the fear that an OB will just take over my body with invasive tests, and at the end possibly just cut me open, or induce me or whatever else they feel like.
So I had my 1st OB appointment.....I hated it. Right away she wanted to put me on BP meds, without letting me try to lower it naturally with some supplements first. I believe she said "Yeah I don't know anything about that. You have to take the meds." Oh, thanks so much. "Are there side effects" she says"Well, all medication has side effects. If you followed that rule, no one would ever take anything" I said, "Yeah....that's why I never take anything." I meant that. I use herbs, not pills. So she said "Well, I have to look it up (the medication she wanted me to take)." I'm thinking, you have to look it up? You're a high Risk Specialist? Shouldn't you just KNOW this? So she turns the screen to me with a list of medical terms I have no idea what they mean - like I'm supposed to understand this. That was her way of assuring me. Seriously. She sent in a prescription anyway.
We drove home. I was waiting to decide if I wanted the meds, trying to think a way out of it. When I got home an old high school friend IMed me asking why I'm High Risk. I wasn't announcing it on Facebook, but she must have seen me mention it in conversation to my cousin. So we started talking. She was telling me about how she lost her daughter when she had preclampsia. I won't go into it, but her Dr. didn't seem it was necessary to take any extra precautions, and her baby died after it was born. I didn't know this story. I thought she had just had a miscarriage. So it was a big eye-opener for me. It really put my situation in perspective. Suddenly me hating Doctors, and not wanting this medication seemed silly. So I went and picked it up.
In the when morning I took my first pill at 8 am. By 9:30, I was hit by feeling hyper and jittery, my hands started shaking so bad. Then My scalp felt tingly, my mouth feeling dry. I called my Doctor and had to leave a freaking MESSAGE. Luckily, these side effect started to subside around 9:50, and I felt better by 10. But before calling, I looked up my medication, because all I was told for side effects was DROWSINESS and DIZZINESS. Not Jitters and hyperness or otherwise. So as I look up this medication, the first 5 where talking about how this medication hasn't been tested much on human pregnancies (after I was assured it was very safe) and can cause a multitude of Birth defects. Now I'm left here thinking "What have I done?"
Later that day, I was told to come back in to the hospital, I had to see the other OB on call, and he took the time to listen to me, gave me alternatives, and took me off my current meds and gave me safer ones with little to no side effects on the baby and minimal to me, with a slow release. So I felt much better.
So that's my story if anyone is reading.
Anyone else feel like without a midwife, you've lost all control of your own choices? How do you deal with all the testing, and interventions. and my biggest question - how do you deal with being told they want to induce you early? When I asked my Doctor why, she just answered with "That's just what we do" (Yeah she's REAL awesome at answering my questions)
So far, I've had my 24 hour urine test and my first blood draw. God knows what else I have yet to go through.